BishopAccountability.org
	That’s Not Funny By Dr. Jaime Romo Healing and Spirituality March 15, 2010 http://www.jaimeromo.com/blog/ UNITED STATES -- "Pope Forgives Molested Children." That was a headline from mock newspaper, The Onion. I think it's funny because the whole clergy abuse history and response by church leaders has been so bad. It's so bad, it's funny. Of course it implies that religious leaders and others blame victims for the pandemic of religious authority sexual abuse. That is the nerve of truth that makes this apparently outrageous article funny. Did you see the South Park episode about clergy abuse? One scene is particularly awful. It shows a summit of bishops and cardinals and they are in an uproar that someone should propose a law against pedophilia. It's so bad, it's funny. Of course, the truth is that the Catholic Church has employed legal teams, public relations teams, and lobbyists, spending millions of dollars to oppose statute of limitations reform related to sexual abuse. Funny is based on the incongruity between the reality and what we want to believe. We want to believe that religious leaders would act clearly and consistently to expose abuse and be examples of changing the behaviors of secrecy and unaccountability that perpetuated a horrific history of religious authority sexual abuse. And then we saw the reality of the pope promoting a religious leader who acted in ways that put children in harm's way, acted as an accomplice to a wave of crimes. And now we read in newspapers what survivors of religious authority sexual abuse have been saying for a long time. Clergy abuse isn't about a few bad apples. It's systemic, not only in the cover up efforts, but also in the culture of silence that pervades religious authority sexual abuse. Religious authority sexual abuse isn't just a recent problem or a U.S. issue. It's systemic and historic, and the mandates to conceal documents and the people who perpetuated sexual crimes are becoming clear. As Tom Doyle points out, "The much commented on Vatican document Crimen sollicitationis isn't evidence of secret orders or a conspiracy. It's proof of something far worse….a deeply entrenched policy." A fish stinks from the head down. The pope knew—said one thing and did another. It turns out those bishops who knew that their supervisees sexually abused children and then allowed them to continue to work as church employees merely acted like the pope when he was Cardinal Razinger. They didn't call the police and neither did he. They said that they were shocked and dismayed and so did he. It's time to re-write scripts of denial. It is time to those who have fiercely and loyally identified with religious leaders to move from cheerleader or oblivious bystander to guilty bystander; from guilty bystander to ally; from ally to change agent. A year ago, The Ryan Report revealed systemic torture and sexual abuse in Ireland's Church-run orphanages and child-care institutions. Four months ago, The Murphy Report exposed the culture of abuse, denial and dishonesty in Dublin. In the past month, we've learned of clergy sex abuse in Austria, the Netherlands, Germany and, not surprising for some, the Vatican. 39 million people in the United States have experienced sexual abuse in some form. Sadly, most victims live among us with near-invisibility, in part because of the denial by those who are most representative of God. As difficult as it is, I believe that it is now the best time for victims to move from victim to survivor; from survivor to survivor-thriver; from survivor-thriver to thriver. You are not alone and there are many of us who have experienced soul death and who stand with you to heal and take back your life. There is support for you to get therapy. There are support groups: Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests, The Awareness Center, Stop Baptist Predators, When will churchgoers say, 'enough cover up and abuse'? I don't know. But there are professional and volunteer advocacy groups like never before: Faith Trust Institute, Institute for Violence, Abuse, and Trauma, National Partnership to End Interpersonal Violence, On Sunday, I went to the San Diego cathedral to stand with survivors and supporters to raise awareness (along with others in 30 U.S. cities) about clergy abuse and encourage the public to demand independent investigations of religious groups' perpetuation of child sexual abuse. It was a peaceful gathering and we spoke to reporters and people coming to and leaving from mass. Someone called the police and three police cars showed up to investigate a news truck illegally parked. There was no illegal parking. I thought it was funny. Some continue to call the police on those who would speak the unspeakable: that religious authorities and those who defend them blindly have perpetuated child sexual abuse and that it is time to end child sexual abuse by religious authorities, even if it means criminal prosecution. I wrote Healing the Sexually Abused Heart: A Workbook for Survivors, Thrivers, and Supporters to help others. I attempt to explain and engage readers in developmental models of healing and transformation for survivors and survivor supporters. Real change and healing will come when survivors and supporters stand together and say, 'Enough! We don't want to live like this anymore. Your community and loved ones need it to stop. You are hugely important and valuable. We will help you if you let us. We will stop you if you make us.'
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