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  Male Sexual Abuse Victims Too Often Suffer in Silence

By Jennifer Green
Ottawa Citizen
June 15, 2010

http://www.ottawacitizen.com/news/Male+sexual+abuse+victims+often+suffer+silence/3154520/story.html

The Men's Project service offers helps in recovery

Most people think sexually predatory priests are loners who have gone rogue, but, in fact, they often work in packs to target victims, says a forensic psychologist.

"These are actually pedophile rings made up of priests who were essentially trading children, sending them different places, taking them on trips where other priests would come and abuse them," David Lisak said in an interview.

"We have plenty of examples of people who become Boy Scout troop leaders, teachers, who get into positions where they will have access to children, and the priesthood is no different. There's no question that some of these priests who are abusing kids actually chose the priesthood because of the power and opportunities that it would provide them."

Lisak will address a fundraiser for The Men's Project, a unique Ottawa service for men recovering from abuse. Founded in 1997, it offers counselling, trauma recovery, anger management and emotional intelligence help. Lisak says the group is one of few in North America, and it is so well regarded that its staff is travelling to cities like Los Angeles and San Francisco to train clinicians.

In the past 25 years, Lisak has worked with hundreds of U.S. death-row inmates who have killed someone after having been abused as children themselves.

"These men have done horrible, horrible things, but they were themselves horribly brutalized."

He says far more men and boys are sexually abused than is generally recognized. One American organization puts it as high as one in six. But even fewer males than females report it, fearing they will be reviled as homosexual or too weak to fend off an attack.

Men suffer just as much as women, feeling they have somehow brought it on themselves. The effects echo down their lives for decades, says Lisak. For perpetrators, "it's far more than just sex ... probably the single most important motivating factor (is) that need for dominance. Then you get an element of anger, a pretty toxic mix of power and anger infused with sexuality and that's what's so damaging to the victim."

Lisak was attacked when he was five by a boarder in his mother's Montreal house. He never told her, even though he was terrorized for three months.

"That really undermined my relationship with my family," he says. Lisak finally told his mother when he was in his mid-30s, and they were at last able to grow close again.

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Documentary Premiere

Healing Boys and Men is to make its Canadian premiere tonight at 7:30 p.m. at Library and Archives Canada. The documentary, by Kathy Barbini, features male survivors of sexual abuse talking. Tickets are $10. For information, call 613-230-6179 or go to www.themensproject.ca .

 
 

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