A Lesson in Empathy

By Jeremy Klaszus
Calgary Herald
March 5, 2012

www.calgaryherald.com/news/lesson+empathy/6250624/story.html

As Prairie Bible Institute in Three Hills grapples with allegations of sexual abuse, its leaders should note a recent and unsettling example of how not to handle such a situation.

Incidentally, the example involves somebody with Prairie roots. Mark Archibald, a former Prairie student who went on to manage a Bible camp, was recently sentenced to 12 months of house arrest and six months of curfew for indecent assault against three teenage boys. The assaults occurred in the 1970s; decades passed before victims found the courage to speak out.

The significance of this courage was apparently lost on John Hand, a former chairman of the camp's board, who suggested in comments to the Herald that the victims should forgive Archibald and get on with life: "There seems to be an unwillingness to forgive and to grow and to move on from where people are at. I think that's why it comes back so many years later."

Of the ways to respond to victims of childhood sexual abuse, suggesting they get over it is one of the worst.

I tried calling Hand to ask if his perspective has changed based on recent letters to the editor, including one from one of Archibald's victims who wrote: "I'll be damned if I let some self-righteous man try to diminish the evil crime that was committed against me." Hand's wife said he is declining comment.

Officially, Prairie Bible Institute has eschewed the blame-the-victim approach, saying it is committed to being transparent, helping victims by directing them to counsellors at Calgary's Centre Street Church and co-operating with police. (RCMP are investigating three complaints related to the school.)

Prairie president Mark Maxwell originally referred to the allegations as "innuendo," but now appears to be giving victims' experiences more credence. In a February statement, he said he's heard "several" stories of abuse, "most emanating from previous decades," and that listening to these stories has been "a painful experience."

At the same time, however, some Prairie supporters have tried to cast doubt on survivors' stories. Some alumni view the surfacing of these allegations as an attack of Satan on the school.

Perhaps it's not surprising, then, that victims and their supporters are sometimes treated as agents of evil on online forums, where they are berated and bullied for dwelling on the negative. Chin up. Lay off the school. Here again is that same message: Get over it.

The real evil - sexual abuse of children, and how it was dealt with (or not) - appears to be of no major concern in this narrative.

Prairie itself hasn't been above blaming and shaming victims. Eight years ago, the institute was sued by a former student who was 14 when she was assaulted by another student on campus. When the victim's mother approached Prairie about the 2002 incident, the school refused to report the incident to police and instead suspended the girl, according to the statement of claim. The assailant was ultimately convicted and the girl was readmitted, but was allegedly barred from attending youth events with other males.

Prairie filed no statement of defence, paying a $20,750 settlement instead.

If a case like that doesn't raise red flags, I don't know what does.

Prairie's leaders are in a tough spot. Maxwell refers to "stories of abuse" in his statement, but in a recent interview on Prairie radio, board chair Bruce Miller said "we want to support those who feel they've been abused." One detects a lingering hesitancy: those who "feel" they've been abused.

Was there abuse at Prairie or wasn't there? If the school truly stands with the abused, its leaders need to send a clear and consistent message to that effect. And they should condemn the blaming and bullying of abuse survivors wherever it occurs, especially when it's perpetrated by those purporting to defend the school. Doing so would show integrity, and likely go some way in rebuilding broken trust.