BishopAccountability.org

Sprague Abuse Case Must Create Community Conversation

The Statesman-Journal
April 22, 2012

http://www.statesmanjournal.com/article/20120422/COLUMN0807/304200044/Sprague-abuse-case-must-create-community-conversation

Sixty-seven percent of sexual abuse victims are children under age 18. About 1 in 3 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually abused before they turn 18.

The statistics are alarming.

Even more alarming is the fact that nearly 90 percent of the time, the abuser is not a stranger.

"It's almost always someone they know, love or trust," said Debbie Joa, Prevention and Protection Coordinator for the Salem-Keizer School District.

A family member, a close relative, a neighbor, a pastor, a scout leader, a coach or a teacher, anyone could violate that trust. We have seen the headlines across the country over the years, from widespread abuse by priests in the Catholic church to high-profile charges against a former assistant football coach at Penn State University.

Now closer to home and fresh on all our minds are the recent arrests of five Mid-Willamette Valley teachers — all within a span of less than two weeks — on sexual abuse charges. One of the teachers is from Sprague High School.

We may not know all the details in these cases, because investigations are ongoing, but one thing is certain: These arrests make us parents worry about the safety of our children. Schools are supposed to be the one place, outside of the home, where we should feel safe to send our kids.

These arrests remind us of the dangers, even in the safest of places, and there is no better time to have a community conversation about those dangers than in April, which is Child Abuse Prevention Month.

"It really is important that we talk about it," Joa said. "We all need to have information to know what to do if we come across a situation.

"Most school employees, they would never abuse a child. They are here to help them learn and grow."

Most school employees, when they give students their undivided attention and heap praise on them, are being genuine and the relationship is harmless. But in rare cases, lines are crossed and the actions become a part of what is called the grooming process.

Grooming is when a predator befriends and establishes emotional connections with a child to deliberately lower their inhibitions and condition them not to tell another adult.

Salem-Keizer School District publishes a brochure listing interactions with students that are appropriate and interactions that are not, and distributes it during mandatory sexual conduct training that is required by law for all Oregon school employees.

The inappropriate list includes making comments that are physical in nature or may have sexual overtones; meeting with students off-campus; receiving or writing personal communication from/to student and/or giving gifts; a pattern of giving special privileges or showing favoritism to a particular student; and invading personal space or being too close in physical proximity.

(We've posted the brochure, titled "Maintaining Appropriate Staff/Student Boundaries," on our website with this story.)

Oregon has some of the strictest teacher discipline laws in the nation, with the legislature passing a series of misconduct laws during the 2005, 2007 and 2009. The laws were passed in the wake of a series of high-profile cases, including one our school district.

Former Houck Middle School band director Joe Billera was the subject of parental complaints for years before his arrest in fall 2004. Today he is serving a 12-year prison sentence after pleading guilty to second-degree rape, sexual abuse, sodomy and other charges involving four female students.

The district's Prevention and Protection Program, and Joa's position, essentially were created after the Billera case.

Educating employees and parents are now priorities for the district, which offers community workshops throughout the school year on topics such as recognizing child molesters, Internet safety and teen dating violence. The workshops are in collaboration with local law enforcement, the district attorney's office and Liberty House.

We are fortunate to have a solid foundation for raising awareness about child sexual abuse. Liberty House is a wonderful resource. Most of the children served there are younger than 7, but the center does see teenagers and get calls from concerned parents.

Casey Mills, child interviewer and family support specialist at Liberty House, estimates the center receives an average of more than 40 calls a week — not counting actual referrals — from parents who aren't sure something's going on with their child but who have a gut feeling and need to reach out to somebody.

Part of Mills' job is to provide community outreach, and that includes visiting local high schools and making presentations about sexual abuse. He developed the presentation, with input from colleagues.

"While there were programs for adults to attend, I felt the piece that was missing was educating teens and the children," he said.

Mills has visited most of the local high schools in the past three years. McNary invites him to speak to its health and wellness classes once in the fall and again in the spring. One of the next stops on his schedule is Sprague, on May 9.

That may be just a coincidence, but Mills was contacted by a teacher at the school in mid-April to schedule a presentation, around the same time language and social studies teacher Michael Montgomery was arrested and accused of having sex with an underage female student.

Montgomery, 49, was jailed April 16 on five counts of second-degree sex abuse, according to Salem Police. He has taught at Sprague since 1989.

Mills plans to be as up-front and honest as he can when he visits the school.

"We will acknowledge what happened and kind of put it on a shelf, because it's an open investigation," Mills said. "But it's also the elephant in the room."

The primary topics of his presentations are sexual abuse, date violence and sexting. But the most important piece, and message, is always communication.

"The kids can ask anything they want. Nothing is off limits," Mills said.

Mills, a licensed professional and nationally certified councilor, says teenagers has asked him everything from "Who should I tell first?" to "Can boys be raped?"

He said he may not always be able to provide an answer, but can refer students to school staff or another community resource.

The purpose of the presentation is "educating the teens on what to do if or when something happens either to them, their friends, their siblings or their relatives," Mills said. "We're giving them the tools they need to be safe and know what to do."

But all the presentations, the workshops, and the mandatory training will not eliminate child sexual abuse. Remember the statistics, and recall the recent arrests. As vigilant as this community is about protecting children and preventing child sexual abuse, it still happens.

Just ask staff and students at five area high schools — Sprague, Molalla, Lebanon, West Albany and my alma mater, Sweet Home.

"It's nice to know that it seems like more cases are being reported," Mills said, "and nice to know community agencies are taking reports seriously."

"I don't want child abuse to happen," Joa said, "but if it does happen, I want to talk about it. My hope is that when situations come up throughout the year, people pay attention to concerns they have and kids report what has happened to them."

Those who work in the field of child sexual abuse agree that it is important for parents to begin talking to their children about the subject when they are young. Teach them that it is not OK for someone to look at or touch their private parts. Continue the conversations as your child gets older.

"The important piece I think Liberty House would stress is being supportive and having open communication, letting the child know it's OK to tell and that it's not their fault," Mills said.

Blame often is a barrier to a child disclosing abuse — they may feel it's their fault and they don't want to get in trouble — so parents should remember to be nonjudgmental and remember who is at fault.

"A person who is in a role of authority and power and influence, the accountability lies with that adult," Mills said. "And or any other adults who know about it and don't act upon it."

Reporting child sexual abuse, child abuse of any kind, is the responsibility of every single person in this community. Even though many of us are not mandatory reporters, we should not hesitate to call local law enforcement or the child abuse hotline for Marion and Polk counties, (503)-378-6704.

"If someone runs across a situation with an adult and child that just doesn't seem appropriate, if the hair stands up on the back of your neck, follow up on that," Joa said.

"Forward This" appears Wednesdays and Sundays and highlights the people, places and organizations of the Mid-Willamette Valley. Contact Capi Lynn at clynn@StatesmanJournal.com or (503) 399-6710, or follow her at Twitter.com/CapiLynn




.


Any original material on these pages is copyright © BishopAccountability.org 2004. Reproduce freely with attribution.