Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse Find Support in Samsn

By Harrison Vesey
Parramatta Sun
May 11, 2017

http://www.parramattasun.com.au/story/4656133/survivors-find-support/

Shane McNamara is a firm believer that even when the odds seem stacked against you, it’s still possible to win with the right team.

A survivor of child sexual abuse, Mr McNamara knows the isolation many male victims feel, as well as the lack of support.

But he also knows that living a good life is possible.

“Everyone deserves a chance to enjoy life. It’s not all doom and gloom. There is a lot of good things in the world, there is a lot of good people,” Mr McNamara said.

He and Craig Hughes-Cashmore are the founders of Survivors and Mates Support Network (SAMSN), Australia’s first national not-for-profit dedicated to adult male survivors and their families.

The two became friends when they were both going through the long process of criminal investigation in 2010. They thought it would be good to have a group to talk to other men about their experiences, but no such group existed – so they started their own.

SAMSN has since become a full-time passion for both men, with support groups around the state as well as in Canberra and Adelaide.

Though statistics indicate most victims were abused by a family member or friend, the Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse has empowered more survivors to speak out.

For many, it’s a secret they’ve carried for decades.

SAMSN social worker Tony Phiskie said having another survivor present makes it easier for men to finally talk about their suffering.

“The guys make a connection with each other, and that breaks their silence which has often gone for 20 years,” he said. “They connect with each other and have a voice.”

Mr Phiskie has been working with victims of child sexual abuse since the 1980s. He said “unfortunately not a lot” has changed in that time and men still face many barriers, including a shortage of services, and the pervasive myth that victims are more likely to become perpetrators.

He and psychologist Mark Griffiths developed a group program for adult male survivors that has been adapted by SAMSN.

The organisation runs eight-week support groups in cities and suburbs including Granville. Each week focuses on a different topic, and the time overall is split between reflecting on childhood and looking to the present and future.

Once men have finished the program they are invited to attend monthly drop-in meetings. The organisation is currently raising more money to start meetings in Parramatta.

Mr McNamara said the groups have helped he and many other men escape the feeling of isolation.

“I have this knowledge because of my lived experience. I was able to get through those traumatic experiences and come out the other end, and I’m functioning really well,” he said.

“For me it’s about how I can share that with other guys, to give them more of a chance to experience what life is all about.

“I’ve met some of the most courageous people that I would never have met if I had continued in my previous profession. Meeting the people and seeing them evolve has been the most powerful thing for me.”

SAMSN also runs supporter workshops for family and friends, as well as service provider workshops for any professionals involved with survivors, including doctors, police, social workers and lawyers.