Cardinal Dolan’s Gamble

NEW YORK
Minnesota SNAP

By Vinnie Nauheimer

April 5, 2012

The subtleties of Cardinal Dolan’s mind are unmatched. New York’s newest comedic cardinal has outdone himself in devising a strategy to bring the house down at Last Supper services on Holy Thursday. Cardinal Dolan, never accused of being shy, has come up with an incredibly unique way to imprint the message of the Last Supper on the minds of New York’s Catholic elite who attend services on Thursday at St. Patrick’s. All we can do is marvel at Dolan’s sharp and rapier like wit. After asking God to allow Judas to speak on the subject of betraying Christ and being turned down, Dolan came up with the perfect living substitute. He invited Cardinal Justin Rigali in his stead!

Let’s hear it for the newly minted cardinal for having the audacity to pull off a stunt like this! Who better to speak about the betrayal of Jesus Christ than the disgraced former head of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia? Who knows more about turning his back on the teachings of Jesus Christ than Cardinal Rigali whose former diocese is now steeped in disgrace and scandal? Disgusting graphic reports hit the papers on a daily basis as testimony is given describing the seamy underbelly of the church and sexually disturbed priests having lurid sex with minors. Excellent qualifications for someone to speak to the betrayal of Jesus. What will this pitiful, contemptuous former Vatican secretary to the pope have to say about his equivalent of thirty pieces of silver?

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