MAINE
Bangor Daily News
April 4, 2014
By Erin Rhoda
The pastor would later tell Linda he set eyes on her the first day he met her — on his first day assigned to a church in the Bangor area. She was actively involved at the church and married, with children. Once, after conducting a church event, the pastor remarked to her, “I fell in love with your hands.”
But it wasn’t love. He relied on his position of power to gain her trust and draw her into his life over a period of three and a half years, Linda said. Then he took advantage of their relationship sexually.
Clergy sexual abuse of children has rightfully drawn much public attention in recent years, as more and more priests have been found guilty of sexual assault or sued for covering it up. But clergy sexual misconduct also extends to adults. It is not a crime under Maine law for a pastor to have sex with a member of his or her congregation, but it violates professional boundaries and is an abuse of power. And it can certainly feel like a crime to the victims, who find their vulnerabilities exploited.
Indeed, 13 other states have made clergy sexual relations with congregants illegal. Some include language specifying that the misconduct happen within the counseling relationship. While it is illegal in Maine for psychiatrists, psychologists or licensed social workers to have sex with their patients, the statute does not refer to clergy.
“The manipulation of false authority, manipulating you through the sacred texts, that’s where the grooming happens. That’s where the damage is,” said Linda, which is not her real name. She wanted to talk about her experience to prevent future abuses and remind people it’s OK to question automatic authority. Just as most people are not perpetrators, most clergy aren’t either. But the few who are can exact lasting damage on their victims and communities.
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