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The Worthy Adversary
We can’t waste this teachable moment: How the teaching of one commandment silenced generations of sex abuse victims and what we can do to change it
Posted by Joelle Casteix on April 16, 2014
Part One: Young Children and the Sixth Commandment
It’s the juicy one: Thou shall not commit adultery.
How do you teach the term adultery to young children? There are two ways:
There is a guilt and sin-laden method that shames child victims of abuse into a lifetime of silence and self-loathing. It also silences witnesses and whistleblowers and fosters continued sex abuse and cover-up in the Catholic Church and other faiths, or
There is an empowering method that can protect our children from abuse.
The Problem
My son is a 7-year-old second grader at a Lutheran school. This week, he came home with this quiz. As you can imagine, I flipped.
Sexually Pure? What seven-year-old truly understands?
Young children do NOT understand what it means to be “sexually pure.” And what about the child who has been sexually abused. According to this worksheet, is that child not pure? Is he dirty or has she sinned in the eyes of God?
NOTE: Fortunately, my child’s teacher (who is required to teach this worksheet as a part of Luther’s Cathechism) is a smart, wonderful woman who has been around the block . She completely understands the serious problems with this definition. She teaches her classes that boys and girls are made differently and that we respect those differences. The end. But the worksheet is still there. And we need to fix it.
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