UNITED STATES
Waiting for Godot to Leave

Kevin O’Brien

My friend Tom Leith notes that most people view marriage as a legal or consensual arrangement, not as an ontological change. By “ontological change” he means a change in our very being.

There are many of these ontological changes that we go through in our lives. Adolescence is the first big one, one in which we grapple with the great change of going from being a child to being an adult. But we recognize other ontological changes in life as well, if only subconsciously.

When a man becomes a father or a woman becomes a mother, we realize that this changes who we are. At least we used to recognize that readily. Many people are very casual about this ontological change these days and don’t recognize the responsibility suddenly thrust upon them by becoming different people from what they once…