Violence, Gaslighting and Flying Monkeys: How Abusers Manipulate their Communities


January 23, 2020

By Mary Pezzulo

I want to say a few words about gaslighting, and about how abusive people manipulate their communities.

The other day on Facebook, I met a woman who has been the victim of some extreme domestic violence. For the record she’s not the same domestic violence survivor as the one we all helped with a gift registry in December; this is a new friend of mine. She’s told her own story publicly for the very first time this week. It’s extremely graphic and horrifying, and she promises there’s a lot more that she’s left unsaid which she’ll reveal later. But what there is now is terrible enough. You can see it yourself on facebook, complete with a picture of her burned arm.

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